


love makes the world go 'round, booze makes it go twice as fast

by scriveyner (trismegistus)



Series: Voltron Fic Collection [20]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Drunken Shenanigans, Fade to Black, M/M, Stuck-in-the-Middle Shiro, Threesome, Tumblr Prompt, Werewolf Lance, shklance - Freeform, vampire keith
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-22
Updated: 2018-03-22
Packaged: 2019-04-06 08:19:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,173
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14052810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trismegistus/pseuds/scriveyner
Summary: Set in the same universe ascrossing paths.“Holy water and vampires don’t go together like, at all. This shit is in the handbook.”Keith frowned, glancing at his phone but the screen had dimmed. “I didn’t get a handbook.”“Yeah, no kidding,” Lance said.





	love makes the world go 'round, booze makes it go twice as fast

**Author's Note:**

> TFLN tumblr prompt fill: #9 - “I’m bringing home some absinthe and some holy water. One way or another, things are going to get spiritual.”

“I can’t get drunk,” Keith said, slumped forward at the kitchen table, one arm folded under his head and his phone held maybe a hand’s width from his nose. He was squinting at the group text, and hadn’t bothered to read aloud the message to Lance, who was wearing a pair of blue boxer briefs and nothing else as he fussed about at the sink. “Do you think I should tell him I can’t get drunk?” Keith raised his eyes without moving his head, as Lance hadn’t stopped washing the handful of dishes that had been moldering in a festive experiment in Darwinism since the last time they’d had company. “Can  _you_ even get drunk?”  
  
Lance tilted his head to the side without looking back at Keith and Keith wondered idly if Lance had ever picked up on the fact that he telegraphed his responses like he had dog ears sitting atop his head. Which, okay, he  _did_ have ears on top of his head right now, but that wasn’t all that common of an occurrence. He watched an ear flick for a moment before Lance responded with an undercurrent of irritation. “Yes, Keith, I can get drunk.”  
  
“But absinthe though?” Keith lolled his head on his arm. He hadn’t had much experience with anything other than cheap beer and whiskey before he was turned, and frankly hadn’t been entirely impressed. Shiro had never been much of a drinker when he’d known him, but that was several years ago. People changed - or, he thought ruefully, died.

Lance wiped his hands on his ass and leaned over Keith, snatching his phone out of his hand and still dripping dirty dishwater. Keith yelped as Lance looked at the text. “You focused on the absinthe part of the equation and not on the stuff that freaking burns you?” he said, as Keith flailed upright and grabbed his phone back.

Keith looked at the phone. “Holy water burns people?”

“Vampires, dude.” Lance wiped his damp hands on his ass again because he was allergic to wearing actual clothing during the week of the full moon and Keith had long since given up fighting him on it. “Holy water and vampires don’t go together like, at  _all_. This shit is in the handbook.”

Keith frowned, glancing at his phone but the screen had dimmed. “I didn’t get a handbook.”

“Yeah, no shit,” Lance said. “How did you survive for like, a year before I found you?”

Keith shrugged loosely.

* * *

Shiro wasn’t quite  _drunk_  by the time he made it to Lance and Keith’s apartment, but he definitely was three shades past sober. And - as Lance had feared - he wasn’t alone. “God  _dammit_ ,” Lance growled and disappeared down the hallway in a flash, having previously decided that nudity was the best homecoming for their boyfriend. Matt Holt let out a slightly pained noise as he manhandled Shiro through the door, because Shiro had turned a very dopey smile on Keith and hadn’t moved.

“That’s  _three times_ ,” Matt yelled in the direction of Lance’s room, where there was some slightly muted crashing. “Fucking  _werewolves_ ,” he muttered half under his breath as Shiro wove his way over to Keith. Keith smiled at him as Shiro raised his hand, brushing his fingers over Keith’s jaw before settling his palm against Keith’s cheek.

“Hi, Shiro,” Keith said, the warmth of his skin and the scent of his blood almost intoxicating. Shiro bit his bottom lip and stared at Keith’s mouth, and Matt cleared his throat from the other side of the room.

“Go now,” Shiro said, waving his right hand in Matt’s direction without taking his eyes off of Keith’s face.

Lance reappeared finally, wearing an open button-down that must be Shiro’s based on the way it tented over his smaller frame, and a pair of unbuttoned trousers. “You know I don’t flash you for the fun of it all,” Lance said, a little sullen, and Matt turned slightly pink. “Thanks for escorting him over.”

“If I took him home like that he’d just lie on the couch and complain about all the things he could be doing with his boyfriend,” Matt said. After a moment’s hesitation, “boyfriend _s_.” Lance smirked and Matt flushed harder. “Keep him for the weekend,  _please_. I’m running some very delicate experiments and I don’t need the interruptions.”

Shiro raised his head from where he had been kissing Keith senseless in the background. “He’s raising the dead,” he informed everyone, and Matt let out a long sigh.

“Not exactly,” he said, and held out the bag he had been carrying in his other hand. It clinked slightly as it changed hands, and Lance glanced through it before pulling out a half-empty bottle of bourbon and grinning.

“Hey, you don’t happen to know anything about holy water, right?” he said, returning the bottle to the bag and resisting the sudden urge to take a straight pull. “Nothing in here is laced, right?”

“Doesn’t really matter if it is,” Keith murmured from behind him. “No point to me drinking it, I’d just be puking it up five minutes later.”

“The only thing you’re missing is the eight hours of misery between imbibing and hangover time anyway,” Matt said.

“Not everyone has the alcohol tolerance of a six-year-old child,” Shiro hummed, and Matt rolled his eyes exaggeratedly.

“I don’t want to see him at  _all_  before Monday,” he pointed to Lance. “But he should still be able to walk home under his own power, capisce?”

“All right,  _mom_ ,” Lance said, shooing Matt. “If you aren’t joining us, I suggest you book it before Keith decides you look more like dinner than Shiro does.”

Matt safely shepherded out the door, Lance threw the lock and the chain both and turned, putting his back to it and grinning. Keith had barely even waited for Lance to close the door before he had his face buried against Shiro’s neck, and twin rivulets of blood escaped from the seal his mouth created on the puncture wound. Shiro let out a low moan of excitement, and Lance threw his shirt at the couch and was already wriggling out of his pants as he crossed the room.

“Just couldn’t wait, hm?” Lance said, sidling up against Shiro’s back and wrapping his arms around Shiro’s waist. Keith raised his head, eyes and mouth both red with Shiro’s blood, and he licked his lips slowly. Shiro slumped back against Lance, and Lance tilted his head to kiss him as well, as Keith lapped the beading blood off his skin.

“I was hungry,” Keith said, smearing the blood on his mouth with a hand.

“Well, so am I,” Lance said, slipping his hand into Shiro’s pants and feeling him vibrate with anticipation. “But you know what I have? Patience.”

Keith looked at the two pieces of shed clothing on the floor, and then at Lance, but by then Lance already had Shiro out of his pants and was stroking him, so Keith sighed in amusement and began unbuttoning Shiro’s shirt.


End file.
